As a mama to an almost 9 lb baby it is sometimes hard for me, and I'm sure many of my readers that had a similar experience to fully understand what horrors and milestones the mother of a preemie must go through. All of us mothers love our babies more than our own lives. However the life of a preemie mother is a tad different.  So one of my readers so bravely volunteered to share. Here is her road so far...

"I'll start from the beginning. I was 36 weeks my baby seemed she wanted to come the week before. I was at work and had to leave because contractions had gotten stronger and every 20 minutes. My boss told me go home take a warm bath that baby is coming soon. I went home made an appointment for the next day to see my doctor told him about the contractions and he checked for how far I was dilated. I was an 1cm he said. He told me go home and wait it'll be fine and lessen as I relax.. The whole month I couldn't sleep from the pains from radiating from my back and everything just changing and adjusting for delivery. I didn't get any sleep not a minute. Every 12 minutes I  clung so tightly onto my husband and screamed into the pillow as we started timing them. We kept waiting. Finally I went pee at 1030am and next thing I knew I was getting off the toilet and my water broke! So we went then grabbed what we could, got in the car, and raced to the hospital! The hospital didn't believe me that my water broke and I begged them to check again, they came back and said well yes indeed your water definitely broke and couldn't believe it because i was only 36weeks. We had to wait in triage until they got a hold of my doctor and  after 2 grueling hours to get the green light for delivery, we finally did. We  made it to the delivery room and I was 2cm they began the inducing medicine and asked me my plan for birth, my pain, they seemed to think I had a plan for everything and I had no idea. I worked and my husband worked until she decided to bust out of there we didn't have to for classes or reading books or have friends or family with any info given at all so i told them that and said whatever you think. Anyways, I got the epidural around 9cm they said that's the longest they've seen anyone go. So the next morning at 325am Tessie was born; her cord was wrapped around her neck and arm twice, and she was only 3ibs 9oz and 17inches long. They let me hold her and my husband clipped the umbilical cord and took her away to the nick. Every 3 hours was a feeding time so they began to see if she would breastfeed because ultimately they is what she would need and it mixed with formula for extra calories. She latched like a pro her first feeding. After they had her hooked to all kinds of machines she had to be placed into the incubator until she maintain body temperature gain weight of course and maintain blood sugar. Thankfully that was it. When entering a nicu you needed to make sure your clothes were free of cigarette smoke any detergent full of perfume and couldn't wear perfume also had to scrub your hands and arms for 2 minutes then again when you enter the room again after changing her diaper and again after feeding her. You were not aloud to fall asleep in the chair while holding her skin to skin and had to feed in a specific time and not to long. So this went on for 10 days. She ended up getting a feeding tube down her nose to her stomach to finish the full feeding because she didn't have the energy. I couldn't imagine how that felt or how they determined it even went in to the right place. A couple days later she took it out her self and did fine. They also had to insert an iv in her foot for fluids to keep her hydrated and removed that as well. She was still hooked up to machines that indicated her pulse and o2 levels and respiratory rate. The 8th day she was able to be taken out of the incubator and placed in an open crib open to the air and sounds around her. My husband had to work this whole time and I was thankful to be able to be there for her at most feeding times. In between after the feedings they asked me to pump and mark the bags with date and time and names. She finally reached 4ibs which was big enough to leave the nicu and go home. It was so scary wondering if her temp and o2 and blood sugars were good. She was so small and couldn't fit any clothes or be handled special ways for everything. So when she gained an ounce it meant the world to us parents which isn't much for others to understand but she is now finally newborn size at 6months weighing now at 10ibs! I am so proud we have made it this far. Today I can say Tessie is finally newborn size and I can now do things with her a full term mom could do when they brought their baby home. There is a big difference between the two mine has an adjusted age so it breaks my heart each time someone asks how old she is;  I hate going to the store or in public. But i am still proud shes my kid and doing so well. It's like a broken record. So it also hurts when i make a post of an update about her growth and someone comments how much their own is doing in my post and theirs is half the age and weights double almost. I hope people can understand with that that that is why I make my posts about her growth. Because I am proud and others should know how far shes come even if it's an ounce."